Beautiful Memoir at the Intersection of Faith and Pain: Review of Lauren Cibene’s Tiger in a Lifeboat
Lauren Cibene’s new memoir, Tiger in a Lifeboat, is a beautiful and honest memoir from a writer who knows what it’s like to stand at the intersection of faith and pain. She makes a conscious choice not to mention the specifics of her trauma. Instead, she writes from her background rooted in the evangelical church, both personally and professionally, giving the following invitation to her readers.
“Whatever it is that broke your heart, feel free to paint that on me. Let me help you carry it, at least while you’re here in these pages.”
Her story speaks directly to those who have distanced themselves from their faith in order to ask tough questions, untangle truth from tradition, and find healing from spiritual trauma.
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The title is a nod to the Life of Pi, a novel where the main character is stranded at sea with a tiger and faces a plethora of moral dilemmas in his struggle to survive. Cibene uses the metaphor to explore the wild and untamed places within herself, which she refers to throughout as ‘the tigress’. While familiarity with the LIfe of Pi adds a layer of meaning to the memoir, it isn’t necessary.
“Life is suffering”, Cibene writes. “It’s hard and so utterly unfair, and people like you and me are carrying it all. I see you. It’s okay to not be okay.”
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The author’s personal and professional journeys through India mirror her healing process and are filled with moments of wonder, fear, and painful self-reflection. Delightfully and vividly recalling the experiences both internal and external that pushed her out of her comfort zone, Cibene gives her readers a first-hand account of discovering India, deconstructing her faith, and making the decision to trust herself and others again.
“There is something powerful about connecting with others who have survived terrible things.”,
That’s exactly the type of connection this memoir offers. It isn’t a neat step-by-step guide to healing from spiritual abuse. Tiger in a Lifeboat is Cibene’s invitation to witness her vulnerability, doubts, and ultimately her hard-won resilience as she struggles with the dark night of the soul so many survivors encounter in the wake of spiritual abuse.
Cibene closes with a dedication that is sure to feel like balm to the soul of those who are at the beginning, end, or messy middle of the journey to deconstruct their faith.
“Dedicated to the tiger pacing its cage within you. I hope you look up, frightening as it may be. I hope you see the divinity inside yourself and your fellow humans. And I hope you let yourself be seen, because you are enough, just as you are. Even in your struggle and your becoming. You are enough.”